newborn babies make me wanna cry. dunno why.

possible baby names; girl - Luka, Kyla, Elli, Lena, Bridget. boy - Gavin, James, Greyson, Hayden.
& no, i'm not expecting d:

i've actually been back for a whole 24 hours, but i didn't feel up to blogging. i have so much to say about the trip, but to sum it all up; it rocked. the whole thing was completely amazing, and it really made me feel better. i met some girls i could see myself totally hanging with. the only things i didn't like was the prices of food @ valleyfair & the hard floor we had to sleep on.

right now memories are coming back, and i'm feeling a little bummed. :/ it's SUPER lame, because i was in a fabulous mood & then *BOOM* i thought of him and got a little hurt. i wish i could just never think of it again, but that's almost impossible. let's just say i miss him more than i thought & sometimes when i call him a fag & talk bad about him, i secretly wish it could back to how it was
i'm such a loser. God help me. ;(

I MISS MY EMILY; COME HOME & GIVE ME LAUGHTER! :]

i said i wouldn't be posting for a few days because i originally thought that today i'd be going to mummies & start packing stuff, but that's not what happened. i decided to stay here & have a little "me-time" because the past few days i have been able to do so. SO HERE I AM SITTING ALL ALONE :(
twitter = going alright. follow me peeps! :)
watched breakfast club twice last night. that movie pwns, seriously. but now i'm all tired & groggy. so i'm off to take a shower! weeee. :P see ya later.

i've never been for twitter/tweeting/twittering. but i finally broke down and got one that i plan to follow-through with and update. not too sure how it's going to work out, but i guess if you want to, you can follow me. my username isn't original whatsoever and that's kind of surprising because most of the time i'm all about unique screennames. but whatever. ;)

been busy the past few days. went to valley city, hanging out with brittany, and heading to minneapolis on wednesday. won't be posting for a while, but ah well. erm, i'll write about valley fair when i get back! also, i'm moving into my dads soon so that too is making everything tricky. :P

i forgot to talk about what's goin' on in my life other than thinking about babies. ;)

the swelling went down on my spider-bite & it's kinda a 'THANKYOUGOD' moment but it still looks gross. i went to my cousin's yesterday and we had a great time. it's nice to talk to her till 3 in the morning, even if there were a few moments i thought i was going to cry. she's one of my best friends and i'm seriously grateful for her presence in my life.

mummies picked me up around 11 & at 4 or so, we went to go shopping for a swimsuit. i have realized i don't mind swimming, it's just the swimsuit part i don't like. being half-naked in front of a bunch of other half-naked people just feels weird to me and i'm not comfortable. but whatever, i bought a blue polka-dot bikini that's go under some NDSU shorts & a woodstock tee. i might wear it for more than just valley fair. i might tan on the deck now, MAYBE. ;)

erm, been bored but it's good to be around people i love. (sorry i'm so sappy right now, but i really am happy.)

16&Pregnant is possibly one of the best shows ever. it has taught me a lot of things, and how hard life really is sometimes. not only this, but it has brought me ridiculously closer to my mummies. we have had a-many conversations about babies, pregnancy, and giving birth. & darlings, i have decided i don't want to have birth ever because it sounds like it hurts like a shitload. & i don't like being hurt! :(

-not true!- i want kids. just not soon or during my studies. i want to be smart, have a good job, then possibly bring another life into this world. if i do that during studies/getting job, i would still keep it and love it - it would just be harder i'd think.

babies are precious, & i can't wait until i'm old enough to take care of one. even now, i could have a baby but i'm not going to because i'm SMART! i will not force anything into anyone's opinions or thoughts, but i suggest not only protection from birth but protection before marriage. such as the choice you make to save yourself for your husband. that's the path i've chosen for myself, just because i know of the STDS you could get and the pregnancy that could happen.

like i said, these are my thoughts & ideas and i don't want anybody thinking i'm preaching because i'm not. promise! ;)

Music: Make Damn Sure,Taking Back Sunday.
OHMYGOODNESSMYLIFESUCKSRIGHTNOW!
well,not really. but here's why i'm be dramatic (not over-dramatic,mind you!):

Apparently,something bit me the other night while sleeping (dad thinks it was a spider,ick!) and now my left elbow&upper arm is ALL swollen. the whole arm itches like shit,&when my move my elbow at all,the whole arm hurts. i'm not so sure this is normal for a freaking spider bite,unless it was a black widow or something. (can't be a BW or i'd be dead.)

so right now i'm not the happiest. EXCEPT! i watched 16 Candles&remembered how much i love Molly movies :D seriously,she's one of the coolest actresses ever. ;)

oh,& wanna hear something even better? :P (not really..) but at 2am i was watching the first half of 16 Candles when all of a sudden i hear this 'beep,beep,beep' noise. i'm like,wtf. so i go to investigate. BEHOLD!it was the fire alarm in my apt. hallway. i was like,OH FUDGE! &so i opened the door,heared the awful alarm,& slammed it shut. &apparently,my cat does not like fire alarms because he went&hid. (haha,scaredycat.) so i woke up dad&we decided to go outside with a whole bunch of people who also live in the apt. i was so cold because i had shorts on while everyone else was in like robes&stuff. this lady was watching me text paige,which really creeped me out. but THANKFULLY,somebody pulled it i guess?&of course the fire people came and turned it off.

man,sounds exciting but it wasn't,lol.

1:27 AM.
Me: lalalalala.. *notices cricket next to my hand*
Me: *FLIPS OUT! & runs to couch,stands on couch & squeels*
*stands there for a while,watching the cricket watch me*
*gets down, & thinks of SMART ways to kill cricket*
*realizes that i'm never going to able to kill a bug ever*
*knocks on older brother's bedroom door*
John: Hellllo?
Me: um,pleasecomekillthisbugplease.
John: *sighs with a smile* where?
Me: by the computer. so now i can't do anything.
John: *looks for bug,sees it,scares it away* it's gone.
Me: WHERE'D IT GO?!
John: behind the cabinets. now i'm going to play wii.
*John keeps saying 'it's back!' as a joke to make me jump. it's working*
John: i see it!
Me: *looks over* OMIGOD! *slams leg into the desk & runs away screaming*
Mom: WHAT'S GOING ON OUT THERE? *was sleeping*
John: *laughing like a mad man*
Me to Mom: ...I saw a bug.

eventually, john killed the cricket & here i am writing away.
i have such a stupid life :P

hello lovely internet people whom i don't know :D hm, i just wanted to say i had a pretty-alright day. caught up on some peoples' summers & such. and then i got in trouble with mummies :/ we made up though, and went to wal-mart to get some stuff. i got new french-manicure polish for her & i, and then gauze pads for john. so yeah, i had a fine day(:

rawr. ;)

erm, just writing another quickie. (ew, gross! ha.) and here's the highlight of my day:

i was watching Wife Swap with mummies & they were two very religious families, and her & i got into a humongous conversation about religion. (please, don't be offended if anything i say hurts you ~ these are mine & my mum's thoughts on religion.) she told me not to take the first testiment so seriously, because if you think about it - how did people live to be like 8oo years old & then die @ 30 in egypt? if that makes you think, YAY! if it didn't, then boo you. :P

soooo, yeah :)

sorry for the all the random memes. i'm a nerd, so what.
really don't have anything to say.
excepttt! listen to Chameleon Circuit < they are really good.
peace, A.

A - All American Rejects.
B - Bayside & The Beatles.
C - Cobra Starship.
D - Daughtry.
E - Evanescence.
F - Fall Out Boy & Family Force 5 & Flyleaf.
G - Glen Hansard & Green Day & Gwen Stefani.
H - Hollywood Undead.
I - In This Moment.
J - Jet.
K - The Killers & Kings of Leon & The Kooks.
L - Landon Pigg & Lifehouse & Linkin Park & Locksley & Ludo.
M - Marilyn Manson & Marketa Irglova & Maroon 5 & Mayday Parade.
N - Nickasaur! & No Doubt.
O - Owl City.
P - Panic @ the Disco & Paramore & Phantom Planet.
Q - Queen.
R - The Raconteurs & A Rocket to the Moon.
S - Serj Tankien.
T - T.A.T.U. & Taking Back Sunday & Taylor Swift & Three Days Grace & Ting Tings.
U - Underoath.
V - The Veronicas.
W - We Are Scientists & Weezer & White Tie Affair.

Make of to-do list of 101 goals. You have 1001 days to get them done...

1. Find an amazing guy I totally *CLICK* &&&! *SPARK!* with.
2. Get a Polaroid camera.
3. Visit a psychiatrist & make sure I'm not crazy.
4. Post better videos to YouTube. Not just the lame ones I have.
5. Stick with my 9th grade maths class. (I'm scared!)
6. See if I could skip gym this year & take summer school gym.
7. Check frequently to The Venue's website & make sure I don't miss any bands that rule.
8. Go to Orange Records with Emily/Paige (both at some point.) & prove that it's the most amazing store ever.
9. While I'm @ OR, buy some Cd's.
10. Get Bayside Cd I've wanted for ages.
11. Visit the comic book store a block away from OR.
12. Walk around downtown.
13. Stop biting my nails.
14. Pamper myself @ the Spa School.
15. Visit Emily in Minot.
16. Get more readers on this thing.
17. Stop listening to such emo music.
18. Make John quit calling me emo because of my hair.
19. Go to a chiropractor.
20. Get a laptop.
21. Put my posters up at Dad's.
22. Buy presents for Lennon's birthday.
23. Start buying presents for ALL of my friends on their birthdays.
24. Audition for something other than the school musical.
25. Don't be such an owl-child.
26. Start answering my phone when people call, no matter what.
27. Get a record player.
27a. Buy records if I ever get a record player.
28. Quit clenching fists when I'm nervous/bored/scared.
29. Finish a story. A good one preferably.
30. Think of 71 more things I want.
31. Be happy.
32. Make Mummies happy.
33. Make Fazza happy.
34. Be nicer to John, & don't act like I absolutely hate him.
35. Don't use *the tone* so often.
36. Be there for my family.
37. Be myself, no matter what.
38. Don't let people change me.
39. STICK WITH THE RIGHT CROWD.
40. Have 1500 songs on iPod.
41. Get two more movies for iPod.
42. Buy RockBand.
43. Convince Dad to buy me some ringtones.
44. Go to Vans Warped Tour. (Yeah, fat chance.)
45. Have FUN on the trip with Brittany.

Okay, I really can't think of any more. Sorry. I'll add more when I think of them. ;)
*1001 Days.*

music: Stay - SafetySuit. (it really is possible to fall in love with a song. or maybe it's just the singer. *drools*)
mood: Mellow & happy!

so i would've posted earlier, but i didn't feel up to creating witty sentences and phrases. oh wait, not never happens anyway.

OH! music changed. now it's Kids - MGMT. entirely fabulous band. very unique & trendy. not going anywhere, HOPEFULLY. because i like them a load ;)

oh blah, these are short little blabs. grr. *thinks*

when i got back from fazza's, mummies turned on 16&Preggos, so we watched that. it was the season finale and it was like, "This'll be the toughest episode... EVER!" so i was like "weeeecan'twaittowatch!" but i ended up like, crying. it really was the toughest episode & it literally tore my heart apart. this couple who are in their junior year, got preggo (obviously.) anyways, they decided they would give the baby away. & then mummies and i got into this discussion about how we could never give any baby away. & of course, i feel emotions for other people and it made me cry and yeah. *don't want to talk about it. meep*
anyways, so i watched this & mummies was like:
Caring & Ever-So-Thoughtful Mummies: If you ever got preggos, we'd keep it. No matter what.
Whiping-Away-Tears Me: Yeah, I know. I could never do that.
Caring & Ever-So-Thoughtful Mummies: But hopefully that'll never happen.
Whiping-Away-Tears Me: HA! Yeah, never going to happen. *I'm nerdy & believe in no sex before marriage. especially after learning all the STDs you can get. YUCK!*
Caring & Ever-So-Thoughtful Mummies: But if it does happen... *goes into speech about fun sex stuff*
Was-Whiping-Away-Tears & Now Walking-Away Me: ...not going to happen. Ever. *end of convo*

most of the time, girls are like "omgilikecan'ttellmymomanything!!!" & i'm all like "hahayousuckbecauseyou&yomumcan'ttalk!" welll, not really. but i'm happy that my mummies & i crossed that "awkward&strange" wall MANY years ago. and that's mainly because i'm sorta crazy and tell her stuff anyways. weeee.

blah, i'm getting tired early :( no night-owl child?! NOOOO!

oh shuttup, i know i'm weird :D but ah welll, don't matter.

hm. i got nothing else.
sooo, bye? :)